This week I got present to the huge influence intention has on how I am being and what shows up in my life. I also got present to the impact on myself and others when I have one intention and yet pretend to be, to do something else – something that is not a function of my intention.
Time is short and I have a powerful intention to honor my word
Its 12:15 and I have just got off an important conference call. There is another conference call scheduled for 13:00. That leaves me with only 45 minutes to get to the town centre, park my car, get to the shops, find the right phone case (for my son), pay the parking, exit, arrive home and dial into the conference call. i (which loves to ‘play small’) comes into play right on cue: “You’ll never get it done today. Too risky – you will be late for the conference call. Son won’t mind if you don’t keep your word. I am sure that I can come up with a good excuse…….”
Thankfully, being mindful I was present and I was adamant that I was going to play full out to honor the word given to son. So I headed out to the town centre committed to playing the game full out to get the right phone case and get back in plenty of time to make the conference call. No traffic. No problem finding a parking place – too easy in fact! Get to the first mobile phone shop. Can’t find the phone case. Find an assistant and ask for help. He shows me the phone case – only one type of phone case. I look at it and it strikes me that that phone case is not the one that occurs as being the kind of phone case that son would like. Make my way to the second retailer and look for the case. Cannot find it and look for help. There is only one person to help and he is already helping another customer. Wait. Great my turn. I ask for help, get it, try out the phone case, it is just right, pay £10, thank the chap for being helpful. I notice that he is smiling and I am smiling. Leave, pay parking ticket, exit car park, arrive home. What? Still fifteen minutes to the conference call. That means that I accomplished the mission in 30 minutes. WOW!
Fully into putting together an inspirational music playlist and my daughter enters
I had set my heart on putting together an inspirational music playlist. It is around 18:45 and I am half way there – looking forward to getting this done and then taking a break. Daughter marches into my room and ‘asks’ for my help in doing her homework. Out of guilt i drops what it is doing and says “OK, I will help you” ignoring that other part of i which is not at all happy about this. i and daughter go downstairs. i and daughter sit around the dining table and she starts her homework. i automatically finds fault with the way that daughter is doing her homework: she is just writing the answers and not showing the workings – how she arrived at the answer. i tells daughter that it is not good enough to just write the answer, she also has to show how she got to the answer. i tells daughter that this will help her in the exams: even if she gets the answer wrong she can get some marks if she is using the right method. Daughter does what she does. i interprets this as you are wasting my time: “If you are not willing to listen to me and insist on doing your homework the way that you are doing it then you can do it on your own!” i makes its way back to the PC and finishing the music playlist.
Once i had retired and I came into play I noticed that i never had the intention to be of service to daughter. The hidden intention was to get the music playlist finished. Everything that occurred – the words, the behaviour – on the surface was just a sham. i pretending to i and i pretending to daughter. I also notice that i created exactly the situation that it wanted to get its desired outcome!
What is and is not showing up in life (including my experience of what is showing up or not) is function of my intention – whether I am aware of it or not. So all I have to do is to look at what is showing up and then asking myself the question “What intention would result in this showing up (or not) in life?” And if I answer that question truthfully then I have the access I need to create the intention that sources the kind of phenomena I want in my life.