Generating Workability, Unclenching The Grip of Illusion

I create the ‘unworkability’ that is present in my living. I create the misery that is present in my experience of living. I say that you do the same. And it occurs to me that collectively we create the unworkability-misery in our lives, our relationships, our families, our organisations, our communities, our tribes, our societies, our worlds…..

How do i-you-we create this ‘unworkability’?  It occurs me to me that we do so because we confuse-collapse ‘what is’ with what we ‘think it is’ and what we ‘want it to be’.  The real ‘wickedness’ is that you-i-we are not even present to collapsing-confusing ‘what is’ with ‘what we think it is’ and ‘what-how we want it to be’.

Allow me to illustrate our default condition of being-in-the-world by posing a simple question.  I ask you to be with, consider, and answer the following question: what is the sound of silence?

What is the sound of silence? Did you grapple with this question? Did you try out this question? Did you live the question?  Or did you simple find that a judgement-answer showed up for you automatically? Did you find yourself thinking “What a stupid question! Silence is silence, there is no sound!”

You and I are conditioned to approach this question and almost every other question through the avenues of  ‘what everyone knows’, ‘theory’, and/or ‘logic’.  What is the sound of silence?  Approached through the avenue of logic, the answer is there is no sound because logic defines silence as the complete absence of sound.  And common sense, ‘what everyone knows’, takes this for granted – it does not question.

What shows up if you question the taken for granted answer to this question?  What shows up if you live the question? What shows up if you actually put yourself in place where there is silence and listen?

If you live this question, experience it for yourself, you will find that there is a sound to the silence. If you live this long enough, several times, you might just find that the sound of silence can be different in different moments.

It occurs to me that now would be a great time-place to sit with this question: where else have I confused-collapsed ‘what is so’ with ‘what i-we think is so’ and/or ‘what i want to be so’?  It occurs to me that if i-you-we live this question then our lives would open up to new possibilities.  And we would get access to increasing the workability of our lives, our relationships, our organisations, our communities, our world.

Finally, remember that what truly counts (in human life) has to be experienced-created-lived first hand in order for i-you to know it as it truly is.  I want to share with you this quote with you:

“There are certain things you can only know by creating them for yourself.”

– Werner Erhard

What If We Lived From This Context: This Is IT & Every Moment Matters?

“The mind is inherently stubborn about change, and seems to snap back to its original position like an elastic band.

But there is catch: when we truly comprehend in our guts the finality and truth that THIS is IT, right now, no matter how our life is, then we grasp  what Werner Erhard was always screaming about:

that no magic pill or workshop or experience of any sort is ever going to come along and finally “fix” you or me or make us permanently happy, and in that very moment of giving up the search for transformation, a transformation paradoxically does in fact occur.

One recognises that one was never broken in the first place, and suddenly all the energy previously devoted to seeking a way out of or through the problem of the unfulfilled self is freed up to power one’s mission and vision, which is a gesture of giving and contribution rather than one of searching, waiting, and hoping.

And that is a good thing, if a bit sobering, because it means we are asked to step up to the plate in life with what and who we already are. We have been given our piece in the game, and it only remains to play wholeheartedly.”

Eliezer Sobel, The 99th Monkey

Life Isn’t Working Out As I’d Like It To Work Out

Life isn’t working out as I’d like it to work out. The question that I am left with is this one, how to be about what is so?  I have been grappling with this (including some help from Gregory Bateson) and I want to share with you what showed up for me.

Lets imagine that I am at a disco and the DJ is playing all kinds of music: pop, soul, rock, disco, R&B, ska, country, jazz…… etc.  Further, let’s imagine I am at this disco to dance – to just dance. What is my experience if I insist that I will only get up and dance to say R&B music?  Is it not likely that I will spend most of my evening dissatisfied – sat in my chair, being dissatisfied with the music being played, complaining that the DJ has not taste, getting drunk ….

Now imagine that I have two normal dice in my hands. And I roll the dice. What shows up? Any combination: two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, or twelve.  Right?  That is simply what is so given the nature of the dice and the game that I am playing.

Given the design of the game, I know that if I play this game or find myself playing this game, I will end up with one of eleven outcomes. I know this beforehand. Yet, I cannot know nor determine what I will end up getting when I roll the dice.  Nor can I know what will show up if someone else rolls the dice for me.


What happens to my experience of living if I make my self-expression, happiness, aliveness, fulfilment, conditional on getting two sixes every time I throw the dice?

Have I not limited myself to being happy-fulfilled, on average, once every 11 throws of the dice? Have I not, at the very same time, condemned myself to the experience of dissatisfaction even misery for the other ten throws?  Have I not stacked the odds against myself?

What happens if I put myself in a position (through being and doing) where I am as expressed, as happy, as alive, as fulfilled, if I get an eleven as well as a twelve?  It occurs to me that I have doubled the occasions for experiencing being alive, being self-expressed, being happy, being fulfilled.

Now imagine that I have arrived at a place where I am ok with whatever the roll of the dice generates.  What is my experience of living in this case?  Is my experience not transformed?

Knowing this, I have a choice in the matter of how I choose to show up, live and thus experience my life.  I can choose to:

  • dance with whatever shows up and in dancing I can became a better dancer;
  • act on others and the world to get them to conform to my wishes – each and every day; and/or
  • resign myself to being self-expressed, alive, happy and fulfilled when life shows up exactly as I insist that it shows up.