You and I meet. We talk. And even before we meet and talk, we have made the most important choice that will affect our meeting and talking. More accurately, it is not you and I who have made the choice. Rather, the choice has been made by the culture which shapes the way that you and I show up and travel.
What is this choice? The choice to talk about what does not work: what does not work about me, about my relationships, about my circumstances, about the world…. The choice that determines that when you and I meet we will talk about problems, deficiencies, dysfunctions, lack……. A choice about what is wrong about me, about you, about us, about the world.
Is there another way to show up and travel in life? Is there another way to show up, listen to, and talking with our fellow human beings? Is there a way that leaves you, i, us playing BIG in life? I invite you to listen to the speaking of Peter Block:
Focus on gifts. First and foremost …. community is built by focusing on people’s gifts rather than their deficiencies….. Citizens in community want to know what you can do, not what you can’t do.
In the professional world of service providers, whole industries have been built on people’s deficiencies…… if you go to a professional service provider and say you have no deficiencies or problems, that you want to talk about your gifts and talents, you will be shown the door…… Go to an association, or a group or neighbours, and tell them of what your capabilities are, and they get quite interested.
This insight is profound … for it eliminates most of the conversations we now have about problem diagnosis…weaknesses, and what’s wrong with me, you, and the rest of the world. It also underscores the limitation of labeling people…….the act of labelling, itself, is what diminishes the capacity of people to fulfil their potential. If we care about transformation, then we will stay focused on gifts, to such an extent that our work becomes to simply bring the gifts of those on the margin into the centre.
… if we want to make communities stronger, we should study their assets, resources, and talents. It is the attention to these things that something new can occur.
– Community, The Structure of Belonging, by Peter Block
I invite me to focus on my gifts. I invite you to focus on your gifts. I invite you and me to call forth, and bring into existence, the gifts of the folks that are in our lives. I invite you and me to label folks by their gifts. And focus our conversations on gifts and what kind of a world we can create by exercising these gifts in cooperation with one another.
Finally, I invite you to get hold of Peter Block’s book – Community, The Structure of Belonging – and read it, thoroughly.