“Who am I?” occurs as an innocent/superficial question until I grapple with it. I experience the same experience when I contemplate this question “What constitute playing BIG?” It’s the looking into the BIG part that has led me down a difficult path from time to time – a path where I end up thinking/feeling that I am not playing BIG. Therefore, to talk BIG is to show up / travel as a hypocrite. Hence, I fall silent: no longer a source of inspiration to myself nor to others.
This Autumn my neighbour opened the cage within which I had placed myself. He disclosed to me the meaning of playing BIG as in the experiencing of playing BIG. How did he do this, and of what do I speak here? Allow me to share story/experience with you.
On an Autumn day, my neighbour Irfan knocked on my door. After customary greetings and little catching up, he told me that he was in the process of cleaning up his garden and had used up his brown bin. And asked if he could use my brown bin (for recycling grass, leaves and such like) if it was empty and if I was not using it.
I showed enthusiasm for what he was doing because I was genuinely enthusiastic. I told him that my brown bin was empty and he was welcome to use it – especially as it was going to get picked up / emptied the next day. I also mentioned that I had been lazy myself – pointing to the mass of leaves lying around on the left hand side of my front drive. And that he’d now given me the motivation to pick up the leaves on my front drive. But not today – today I didn’t feel up to it. Then I rolled the brown bin to where he was standing and gave it to him…
Not long after, I happened to be in the kitchen. Looking out towards the front of the house. What did I see? I saw Irfan picking up the mass of leaves on my front drive and putting them into the brown bin that I had handed to him. I can see him, right now in my minds eye, picking up those leaves. Simply picking them up. What was present? Surprise. Shock. Gratitude. Gratitude. Gratitude. Sense of wonder – how such a small act of kindness can make such a BIG emotional/spiritual impact.
This experience disclosed the following to me:
- It’s not the scale nor the difficult of the task/project that makes it BIG;
- It’s the difference/impact of that which one does in the lives of our family members, friends, neighbours, community, strangers etc; and
- That which is given / done without it being asked for, and done without imposition or expectation, that often makes such a big impact.
There is something more. Irfan picking up his garden leaves is Irfan picking up his garden leaves – ordinary. Irfan popping over and picking up my garden leaves, without being asked, Irfan showing up as extraordinary – making a positive difference in the world.
I wish to end this conversation with this thought: playing BIG as simple/easy as popping over to your neighbours front drive and picking up the garden leaves, or cutting your neighbours lawn, or inviting your neighbour over for a tea and a chat.
Next time I will share with you the larger impact of Irfan’s action – the avenue that it opened up for me to make a difference in a fellow human being’s life.
Until the next time….